In Psychotherapy , Self Help. Sometimes, one person has a disorder that has a direct impact on his or her partner. The better a spouse is able to recognize such disorders, the less chance there is of intensifying them. Mark any of the problems described below that may be affecting your relationship. It often goes unrecognized because the substance abuser is still able to work and is competent in many ways.
Spouses who have been accused of being too tense or unreasonable often think they are overreacting. Telephone listings for these organizations are found in most community phone books. Sexual compulsions are another kind of addiction that have a tremendous impact on relationships. Normal differences in sex drive and interest can usually be worked out through empathy and good communication; but, when one person has a sexual compulsion, he or she can make demands or show interests outside the home that have a devastating impact on the relationship.
Take a firm but sympathetic approach by standing up for what is right for you sexually and setting limits on what you will not tolerate. Sexual dysfunctions such as premature ejaculation, impotence, sexual aversion, underactive interest, underarousal, and inhibited orgasm can also cause relationship problems.
Usually, these conditions are more easily recognized than sexual compulsions and there is less confusion about who needs help. If your partner has such a problem, it is important to realize that it is not a reflection of your attractiveness and that you cannot solve it by badgering him or her to be more sexual. If you are unable to resolve sexual differences on your own, persistently request that you and your partner seek help. Obsessions and compulsions that are nonsexual also affect relationships.
When a person is overconcerned with safety, tidiness, germs, and order, the whole household can be affected. Seek help to distinguish between obsessions and standards that fall within the normal range. Let your partner know that compulsions can be treated with medication and therapy. Depression and moodiness may go undetected in their milder forms. Your partner may be tired, withdrawn, unmotivated, and have little sexual desire.
