You know the cringe-worthy old married couple who openly bicker about each other in front of other people? The first one takes offense and says something snarky. Meanwhile, everyone else in the room is looking at their watches or trying to figure out an excuse to be somewhere—anywhere else. As you date and consider marriage, I hope you will intentionally and affirmatively work to create relationships that do not end up as bickering or even hostile.
Remember when you were young and in love and your former loved one could do no wrong? Remember how glowingly you spoke about him or her to other people? Think about the way you have sometimes talked about your former spouse, and you may have your answer. After a couple has been together for a significant time, they often start to notice little things about each other that annoy them.
They are matters of personal preference. Who is right? We both are. The truth about the character and quality of the voice is completely in the eye of the beholder.
Any annoyance we have about those little things that irritate us is our own. And the enjoyment of the same thing is also our own. Most of the things couples publicly bicker about are just that way.
If we understand that our feelings originate inside us, it is easier to take responsibility for them and master them. I am only doing so now to illustrate that many things we feel very sure about are often just matters of opinion and no one needs to be wrong about them.
