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Swiping through friends' dating apps gives me a legal high. Like a lot of other women in long-term relationships , I totally missed the online-dating boat.
My hope is that my friends let me play romantic roulette with their love lives because they think my job affords me some top-secret dating intel.
In reality, they probably just let me do it because of how much it fascinates me. They see my delight in swiping, an activity most of them find boring or even disheartening at this point, as refreshing.
But I've never actually been on a dating app as myself, a black woman. And honestly, I'm kind of grateful for that. Yes, online dating seems fun from where I'm standing, but I think doing it as a woman of color would damage my faith in humanity.
Of course, women of all races have to deal with BS online. White women are no exception. But women of color lack that extra race-based privilege, which can cause some mind-bogglingly stupid reactions from people in the online dating world. Listening to her experiences makes me want to set something on fire. Christian has seen profiles declaring that they're interested in every race except black women, and someone once told her "her kind" wasn't "good enough to date. What bothers me the most is the fact that I'm not given a chance.